Busy Distracting

There is a huge part of me (and maybe for all of us) that works to keep me from hurt, pain, or any kind of unwanted emotions... it's the distraction technique. Now there are many other ways that I keep from feeling these unwanted emotions, but this is the busiest of my coping mechanisms.
It is amazing to me how busy I can keep myself, in order not to feel, not to think about things, in order not to work on certain things, or even not to ponder on the Lord.
I have notcied recently that even when I'm getting ready in the mornings, I play music, some Christian songs, some not, but noise none the less. Here at work I often bring books to work with me in case of a slow period. Today I was going to read some of a book that I had put down recently... I skimmed through a couple of pages, and then found a bazillion other things to do.
Distractions can come in all shapes and sizes, and don't even have to be visible. I don't think this is only me either. I can't count the number of times I have sat down and tried to read my Bible, or tried to sit focused in prayer, and my mind just goes 90 to nothing, about nothing really.
My mind is the greatest distracter of all... thinking about ridiculous things, going over thoughts again and again, pondering what ifs, day dreaming about this or that, even thinking about things I really don't want to think about. My mind will go to extreme lengths to distract me from what is more important.
It takes a constious effort on my part to sit down and focus and work, and contemplate and get things done.
I will have to say that this distracting busy body mind of mine has been very good to me over the years, it has protected me in many ways, but now, when I need it to stop and take a breath, stop and relax, sit and just be for a while, it can't. It's almost like I have trained it a little too well over the years.
One of the sentences that I skimmed over this afternoon before giving in to the distractions was, "We are too active for the kind of reflection needed to sustain a life of love with God and others." That is so true for me, in my life, in my head. See for me, and my creative and imaginative brain, I don't have to be physically active, because my mind can outrun me any day! I can be active in my mind while just sitting and staring.
I am hoping that this distracter will soon wear out... I can tell it's coming closer to just collapsing from exhaustion. But I also know that in my own life there is a sad reality which I also reread briefly, "most of us will not go forward until the pain of staying wehre we are is unbearable."
I think this is actually one thing I have going in my favor, as long as I can keep that distractor from trying to convince me otherwise.
Whew! Ok, enough distracting, bye......... ;o)